I woke up in the middle of the night- which is a first I might add- to the sound of my favorite song "A Thousand Years". At first my vision was quite blurry, then I got a clear look at my surroundings, and I was blown away by what I saw!
Right in front of me, on the wall facing the right side of my bed, " I LOVE YOU" was scribbled there! Just like that, plain and clear. I didn't need to over think, I knew exactly who did it! I lifted the covers, got out of my bed, and followed the trail of papers on the ground. It was extremely romantic and mysterious, and I love both! He also had sweet phrases written on each piece of paper! And each took me back in time, each revived a memory of our relationship!
"I will always pick you up when you fall." My heart skipped a beat, because that was the first time we actually met. It was very embarrassing! I was jogging in the park as usual, it is a daily ritual for me, and I tripped over something my eyes missed. I was too caught up in the music to notice the toy someone must have dropped in the middle of the track. I ended up with bloody hands and knees, and I marked him with my blood when he gave me a hand! We headed to his apartment because he insisted on fixing me up.
"You will have loads of frozen yogurt anytime." I loved that one, because I'm addicted to frozen yogurt. I actually had two large cups when we went to Pinkberry!
"Never be ashamed of showing your feelings." It took me back to the gloomy day when my grandma passed away, and I was trying my best not to cry. Well, I couldn't hold it for a long time, and I ended up crying hard and ruining his shirt.
And the trail continued all the way to the back door, and there was the last note. It was the best!
"I NEED to wake to your face everyday, and I WANT to be there for you forever." Did I read that right? And does it mean what I think it does?!
I opened the back door, and there he was, kneeling in the middle of my yard, in his pj's, with a tiny box in one hand. It was perfect! Being the patient girl I am, I squealed a YES and sprinted to his opened arms, without breaking eye contact. His deep blue eyes were his best feature, I always got lost in them trying to count the hypnotizing grey flecks.
Just before he could engulf me in his warm hug, he started fading, as if a black hole was sucking him, taking him away from me...It was the moment I really woke up, and my heart was beating wildly as I glanced at the blank wall. My vision was blurry for the second time this night, and not because I didn't wake up fully. Tears flooded my eyes, and I was sure mascara was all over my face. Not like I care! I sipped whiskey straight from the bottle as I changed the song on my phone to "Whiskey Lullaby" instead of "A Thousand Years". How perfect?! My life was nothing near that song or the dream I just had! I actually live in my lonely apartment that was consumed by darkness at the moment. I have no family left, I have nothing. Death claimed all my loved ones. And exactly a year ago, it took the love of my life, the only one that gave my life a meaning. I reached for the mini fridge next to my bed, perhaps a third bottle can take the pain away, not the memories, not my love for him that I will always carry in my heart... just the pain.
